"Sometimes," said Pooh, "the smallest things take up the most room in your heart."

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Ella, 1 day old

Ella, 1 day old, grasping onto mama's thumb

When Ella was born, she was doing so well that she didn't need to be immediately transferred over to the level III NICU at Children's Hospital. She was breathing on her own and doing really great. She needed oxygen, of course but for her gestational age, she was a rock star! Last night, she started struggling a little bit more with her breathing and over the night and into the morning, she required more and more assistance with her breathing. The machines were doing too much work for her and she needs a breathing tube. They are also going to administer drugs to help her lungs, which are not fully mature and do not have enough surfactant in them to work properly. 

The doctor we spoke to said this is incredibly common in babies her gestational age. The first 12-24 hours, they often can start to struggle more then they did at first. So she should be okay, she just needs some extra help breathing. 

It was a difficult day though. I still haven't been able to hold her and I so desperately want to have her against my skin. The most I can do is stick my bare hands into her isolate and allow her to have SOME type of skin on skin contact. She's distressed quite easily and cries often but today when I was in there, I had my hand in her isolate and she had her entire teeny, tiny hand wrapped around my thumb. It seemed to keep her calm until they came in to take her to Children's Hospital. 


  1. That screaming and fighting is the Bell side of her coming out :) she will be fine My Girl....I have a lot of friends Praying and sending energy for your family. I know Olivia is stressed as well. Mom was home every day,and now she isn't.We love you Chrissy.

  2. I had a migraine all night - puking kind where smells and light only cause additional jabs of pain. Don asked me if just rubbing his hand on my back held, but I finally had to tell him to stop. It was just more stimulation than I could take. It hurts when loved ones try to help and you have to turn the away. But it was easier for me to cope with the pain being quiet and stimulus free. I wonder if on some ubber level, if that is what it's like for Ella. She has so much to cope with... I imagine her stamina is not very long either. I am so sorry you can't just wrap yourself around her and make it better. You all remain in our hearts and prayers!!! HUGS!